’LITTLE RALPHY ON MATHLittle RALPHY returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.‘Why’ asks the father?‘The teacher asked ‘How much is 2 x 3?’ ‘‘I said 6”, replies RALPHY.‘But that’s right!’ says his dad.‘Yeah, but then she asked me ‘How much is 3 x 2?’‘What’s the fuckin’ difference?’ asks the father.‘That’s what I said!’LITTLE RALPHY ON ENGLISHLittle RALPHY goes to school, and the teacher says, ‘Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?’RALPHY says ‘Mas-tur-bate.’Miss Rogers smiles and says, ‘Wow, little RALPHY, that’s a mouthful... ‘Little RALPHY says, ‘No, Miss Rogers, you’re thinking of a blowjob.’LITTLE RALPHY ON GRAMMARLittle RALPHY was sitting in class one day. All of a sudden, he needed to go to the toilet. He yelled out, ‘Miss Jones, I need to take a piss!’The teacher replied, ‘Now, RALPHY, that is NOT the proper word to use in this situation. The correct word you want to use is ‘urinate.’ Please. I never noticed how hot it... “ She coughed and pointed at my tented robe. Oops! I covered up and she put on her damp, asexual robe.Over the next week, mom became more tolerant of our casual attire, but refused to relax her own garb. Then it happened. The unwelcome sound of rushing water woke me from a sound sleep with a sudden need to empty my bladder. Since it was 3:00 A.M., I didn’t bother putting on my robe. My semi soft dick and I headed for the Master bath naked. When I groggily realized the water rush was not just in my dream, I ran out to the hall bath and stepped into a large pool of very cold water. At first, I believed another winter chill had frozen a pipe that split a hose leading to the toilet tank. That made no sense. “OH SHIT!!” escaped loudly from my lips before I could suppress it.As I bent to find the edges of the pool and source of the noisy water, I failed to hear my mom come into the hall in her robe and Sue’s flannels or realize that my naked ass and swinging.
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